August 27, 2010

Commentary: Happy Birthday to my mom!

My mother, Mary Ruth Carpenter Mayhew, and guess who at mom's recent 80th surprise birthday party. It was held before mom and dad returned to Florida for the winter.

Today is a special day in the life of yours truly for a couple of reasons. First, today marks the first day of the start of my first real vacation since I started The Carolina Scoop over two years ago.

I appreciate all of the questions and thoughts regarding my mother-in-law, Betty Ross. She is doing better and I will get to see her over the next week. I'm looking forward to some “down time” as well. Rest is good. Badly needed rest is, well, necessary.

I think I was beginning to flip the other day when I put dirty socks in the refrigerator and put the milk jug in the dirty clothes basket. Ugh, it's time for a break.

More importantly, today is my mom's 80th birthday. Recently, my sister, Karen, and one of my cousins, Susie, teamed up to throw mom a surprise birthday party out at the hut at Centenary United Methodist Church in Mt. Ulla, NC.

About four weeks ago, my sister called me. “You tell anyone about this and I'm going to kill you,” she said.

My dad, Don Mayhew, and I at the party. We're laughing because my sister, Kay, just put mom's "birthday hat" on her.

Funny thing is, I knew my sister was serious. So yet another secret I keep in my life. This one kept for several weeks.

My parents spend four months in Mooresville and the other eight months in Florida, so I try to talk to my parents several times per week. And as we talked, the only thing I could think is “boy, are you going to be surprised.”

My brother, Donny, and his two boys, Kody and Drew, showed up practically “out of nowhere” to visit days before the party and mom didn't think anything about it.

My dad even knew, telling me he knew about it for a week before the big day.

“Whew,” I thought. “I'm not the last to know.”

It was a special day for my mom, Mary Ruth Carpenter Mayhew, who was truly surprised. She was even more surprised when she realized I knew about it weeks in advance.

Mom came from a family of eight kids – four brothers and four sisters – and grew up in Mooresville. Her brother, Bob, was killed in the Korean War.

And growing up wasn't easy during the years of The Great Depression and years after. Mom was once horribly burned as a child in an accident at her house.

But she survived and pressed on.

She took her nurses training next to the old Lowrance Hospital near downtown Mooresville and embarked on a career in nursing.

Mom – known to the family and close friends as “Mary Ruth,” – met and married my dad, Don, in 1951. And they had three children: Karen, Donny and me.

A rare photo of my entire family taken during mom's party; front, left to right, is Mary Ruth Mayhew and her husband, Don. Back row, left to right, me, my sister Kay and our brother, Donny. Mom is decked out in her "birthday attire." It's rare to have all of us in the same place at one time.

Dad was at one time a police officer for Mooresville and moved to Michigan when the automotive boom of the 50s was starting. And there was mom, with two kids.

Twelve years after Donny was born, I came along. Mom was 41, dad was 43.

And mom and I were in the fight of our lives because I was born premature (a pound and 14 ounces) and we both nearly died.

Over the years, I provided mom (and dad) with lots of, lets say, parental opportunities.

Was I a challenge to this truly beautiful woman growing up? Uh, that's a big “yes.” From putting landscaping rocks into an oil tank pipe to beating her newly-planted shrubs and to pulling down her decorative ivy outside, I was the handful for my parents.

Yet mom, in her own special way, kept from killing me or sending me off to the circus. (I heard either "God, grant me patience" or "Wait until your father gets home" my whole childhood.)

And I continued to live and breathe my way through childhood, then the teenage years and into adulthood.

And today, I'm proud to say as one-third of the Mayhew “brood” on hand for the big festivities, I wish my mother, Mary Ruth Carpenter Mayhew, a Happy 80th Birthday!

Mom has witnessed a lot of history in her life, as well as a lot of joy and sorrow. Today, while traveling between two houses in two different states, mom enjoys a good game of Bingo, slot machines and shopping at Walmart.

She also enjoys a good meal at Golden Corral (go early bird specials) and staying on top of dad and his "honey do" list.

Giving mom a card on this special day for her just wasn't enough; I had to put my thoughts about mom down on paper.

I love you, Mom, and happy birthday!

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